CHAPTER 2- NEW AGE IDIOT BOX: SOCIAL MEDIA

 

We all are surrounded by a crowd of unknown faces, with unknown intentions, lost thoughts and buried noises of mind and heart. Don’t you think physical features don’t do enough job of defining this crowd?

Just like every girl next door I dream of having a well-settled life and a prosperous future. I have always believed in the power of relationships, be it friendship, love or family. But a few series of incidents tried to shatter my jar of dreams into pieces. 

Back in April 2020, I started receiving obscene pictures from a fake ID on Instagram. I started receiving uncensored pictures which pulled me into a storm of self doubt, low self esteem and depression. The question I used to ask myself while looking at my reflection in the mirror was “ Is something wrong with my appearance?” But the real pain lies in the answer to that question. As it is our nature of blaming ourselves first whenever something goes wrong, I did the same. 

Right after receiving those pictures, I was filled with angst and asked them not to do it again. I abused them to my heart’s content, cause hey! That’s what you would have done too, right? 

To my surprise, it didn’t stop there! They started sending me texts mentioning  they wanted to have sex with me and ride me. I immediately reported it to cyber cell.

This left a huge impact on my mental health. I got diagnosed with clinical depression. I went through series of therapies but it started helping me only when I decided to help ‘myself’. The constant support of my family and friends is helping me to come out of it.

You see there are highs and lows of depression. There will be good days filled with laughter and fun, but there will be bad days filled with overflowing faucet of tears and sadness. The laughter lines on our face is a deception we use to hide our pain. Being depressed doesn’t mean sadness and locking yourself in your room all the time. Many times the happiest souls around you can also be the saddest.

In my opinion social media hasn’t invaded our privacy, we ourselves allow the same by sharing our privacy with people whom we trust easily. Cause in the end, “people kill people”.

The investigation is still going on and there’s hope that I get my peace back.

I keep myself busy with work and try to be productive but memories of those incidents relapse time to time. I still get inappropriate texts, but I take immediate action against it. This is a battle to be fought with bravery, which is why I chose to share my story. I hope I can push other girls and also boys to speak up for themselves and not let the thought of self doubt settle in their mind. I have learnt to look at the bright side, because there are good days after every bad day.